


Mutant And Proud, Right?

by samoose_the_moose



Category: X-Men (Comicverse), X-Men (Movieverse)
Genre: Anxiety, Charles Has Issues, Charles Is A Wallflower, Charles needs help, Cherik - Freeform, Depression, ESD, Erik Tries To Help, Humans are dumb, M/M, Multi, Mutant Rights, Mutant School, Mutants, Mystique - Freeform, Not All Humans Though, Other, Professor X - Freeform, Racism against mutants, Self-Harm, Suicide Attempt, Telepathy, The butterfly effect, Therapy, X-Men AU - Freeform, X-Men Teenagers AU, X-men - Freeform, emotional support dog, magneto - Freeform, mutant and proud, they're teenagers, trigger warning
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-19
Updated: 2020-08-19
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:00:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25990990
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/samoose_the_moose/pseuds/samoose_the_moose
Summary: The line is clear between humans and mutants. A big political issue, threatening the beginning of a war that could possibly become WWIII, divides them. They're different. And the humans are afraid.Sixteen-year-old Charles Xavier, a mutant, a no one, has had a tough past. Constantly hearing thoughts and being pushed away by his mother, he developes several issues. Depression and anxiety being only two of them.By recommendation from his therapist, Charles gets and emotional support dog after a suicide attempt, and shortly after he's placed in a school for both humans and mutants. Though, the humans don't know about the mutant part.At Grey's School for gifted youngsters he meets Erik Lehnsherr. Another boy haunted by his past, but with a strong, steel exterior. Almost literally.But can Erik keep Charles on this earth?
Relationships: Erik Lehnsherr/Charles Xavier, Raven | Mystique & Charles Xavier, Sean Cassidy/Alex Summers
Comments: 5
Kudos: 25





	Mutant And Proud, Right?

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry this is so long... sometimes I can't stop myself. Do y'all prefer longer or shorter chapters? Let me know! Anyway, hope you enjoy it! (I haven't proof read this so this shall be fun...)

For as long as he can remember, Charles has been able to hear them. The voices. When he first started hearing them, his mother Sharon dismissed him, told him he wasn’t hearing right, that it was a figment of his imagination. But he felt the way she feared for it. He was only nine years old at the time, and could hardly understand it and the way the world was shaped.

It wasn’t like the voices went away after some time, in fact, they only grew stronger. When Charles was around eleven he started to understand the fear his mother had held when he told her about the voices. He had always been a smart child, and understood the way the world was at the young age of eleven. He understood that he was one of the things most hated, and at the same time feared by humanity. He later learned not to speak to his mother about it, as Sharon Xavier had started to drown herself in liquor after the sudden death of his father. So he kept quiet about the things he heard and inevitably understood, trying his best to ignore it all and pretend to be normal.

When he was around thirteen, he had his first noticeable slip up. He had been sitting in class, staring at the board at the front of the class where the teacher stood and talked about math in boredom, his usually eager mind to learn already educated on these things. They had been talking about placing him a class above, since he seemed to have no problems at all in the one he was currently in. Everything was too easy. Math, english, geography, biology, and so on. He excelled at everything, except at making the voices go away.  
One particularly loud thought that day had been something along the lines of “I wonder what’s for lunch today”. An innocent thought. And yet, when Charles replied out loud with;  
“I think lasagna”, the whole class turned to stare at him, including the teacher.  
“What did he just say?”  
“The principle will hear of this rude interruption.”  
“Did he just answer my thought- no, that’s impossible. But what if… no. He’s just some freak. Or… what if he’s a mutant.”  
Charles just sat there, fearing what would happen next, not surprised when the teacher wrote him a detention slip for interrupting her.  
He went home with his head low, giving his mother the slip of paper wordlessly, looking up at her with shocked, tear filled eyes when she slapped him.  
“Go to your room”, she gritted out through her teeth.  
Never in his life had he hurried up those wooden stairs so fast.

Rumors had of course spread as quick as wildfire, conspiring he may be a mutant. The world wasn’t on the right term with those, the inequality between mutant and homo sapien being absurd. But that’s society. As soon as someone’s different, they’re the freak. And humans loved to do experiments on anything different. And Charles had thought he couldn’t understand his mother’s fear for him when he came to her about the voices more. He had been wrong. 

When he turned fourteen, he started to understand what he was. He wasn’t human, that had always been obvious to him. He was a mutant. After a lot of research, a telepath, to be exact. Which, of course, explains the voices. His mind used to be vibrant, before he knew of his powers and the world’s thoughts of people like him. But the more he tried to suppress his powers, ignore the voices, cut them off and shut them out, the more empty he started to feel. In a way of attempting to cope with it, he found during an especially bad panic attack that pain helps. So every time he felt himself spiraling, he would lock himself in the bathroom (at home or school, it never mattered) and he would press the straight razor, which he had found a bunch of in a box that had belonged to his dad, and mark his inner wrist. 

When Charles turned fifteen, he was placed on zoloft, which were anti-depressants, and xanax, more pills to keep him calm, relaxed and from having a panic attack from all the anxiety he felt from feeling others emotions and hearing their thoughts, while trying to pretend he didn’t and that he was normal. It destroyed his mental health, his drunk mother always beating him, and on the rare occasion when the woman was sober she’d only ever be full of fakeness. Fake love. Fake care. All feelings fake for him.

It wasn’t long, until he couldn’t take it anymore and attempted suicide by overdosing on his prescription pills and slitting his wrist deeply, all the way from his wrist to the nick of his elbow. He survived, and was put under suicide watch at a mental hospital for three weeks. His therapist recommended an emotional support dog, and what else could Sharon do but get him one. His therapist, Mrs. Smith, said he could take the dog with him to school, advised he should. She knew about his mutant status, and suggested him taking the dog with him to school would be better for his safety.

But in the end, Charles never took the cute little golden retriever they had gotten him with him to school, mostly since he had started getting beaten up there. He feared they might hurt his dog, which often caused him to have panic attacks at that thought. 

With the dog, which he had named Buddy, his mother started hitting him less. They both knew the dog would interfere if she did, ready to protect and support Charles at any time. Despite his mother telling him not to, Charles let Buddy sleep with him in his bed. It was comforting to him, having something warm and soft next to him which he knew would help him if necessary. He never trusted any human enough for that.

In early january, shortly before Charles’ sixteenth birthday, him and his mother had a strange visitor. While the man talked to Sharon about a boarding school they would accept Charles at, Charles could hear his thoughts.  
“I’m not sure if she knows about her son’s powers… - mutant school… - powerful telepath…”  
A school for mutants? Charles grew more curious, looking through the man’s head for more. He saw a girl with fairy-like wings, a girl with red hair and blue skin which suddenly turned into a bunch of scales and suddenly she looked normal. A boy was controlling metal with his mind, another boy was screaming, shattering every glass in the room. Another boy was sticking his head underwater, gills forming at the side of his throat, allowing him to breathe underwater. Charles was astonished, but snapped out of the man’s head when his mother called for him.  
“Charles! There’s someone here to see you!”  
“Finally I’ll get some peace and quiet when he’s gone.”  
It stung, coming from his own mother, but he put up a façade and walked down the stairs, Buddy following close behind. Usually the golden retriever wears a red vest to let people know not to touch him, that he is a service dog. But Charles doesn’t bother with it when at home. Surely it must get hot with that thing.  
“Charles, this is Mr. Davis, he’s a teacher at Grey School for gifted youngsters”, she said. “You’ll be starting there in a couple days, seeing as you can’t go a day without getting hit at your current school.”  
Charles blushed in embarrassment, glaring slightly at his mother for being so blunt about it.  
“It’s a pleasure to meet you”, the teenager said to Mr. Davis, putting his hand out for the older to shake.  
“The pleasure is on my side”, he gave him a friendly smile, his eyes crinkling at the corners.  
“Where is this school?” Charles asked.  
“It’s in Charlotte”, the man said. “You’ll be staying in a dorm there, seeing as you’re old enough for it and it would be absurd to let you drive 20 hours a day.”  
“10 hours is good enough”, Charles’ mother thought.  
“Okay”, the teen said. “When exactly am I supposed to start there?”  
“January 15th, it’s a day after the semester starts”, he said with a small smile. “I think it’ll be easier for you to not come the day it all starts. Less hectic.”  
Charles nodded, not protesting with the fact that that’s in 4 days.  
“May I have a word with Charles alone?” The man turned to Charles’ mother.  
“Of course”, she said, but Charles could easily read her confusion as she left.  
“This is a school for mutants, isn’t it?” Charles asked immediately.  
“That’s right”, the man smiled. “So, your mutation… a telepath, I assume?”  
Charles nodded.  
“Are there really others like me there?” He asked.  
“Yes”, the older man responded. “This is a school for both mutants and humans, but the normal children know nothing of the others being mutants. At the school, we help teach them control. Does that sound like something you’d be interested in?”  
Charles nodded eagerly.  
“Wonderful. I’ll see you in a few days then, Charles”, the man smiled and turned to leave.  
“Wait!” Charles said and the man turned back around. “What’s your mutation?”  
The man smiled and clicked his tongue - and then he was gone.  
Charles stared at the spot where the man had disappeared from for a few seconds, before a small smile broke out on his face. He was going to fit in somewhere. Buddy wagged his tail, licking the telepath’s hand repeatedly. Charles chuckled, bending down to pet the golden retriever.  
“We’re gonna be movin’ Bud, yes we are”, he said with an affectionate tone, the dog licking his face excitedly. 

The days went by in a flash after that, filled with Charles packing his things, the weighted blanket he possessed causing him quite the struggle when boxes filled with books would become too heavy with it in. The blanket itself already weighed 16.5 pounds, so he opted to just put it in the back seat of the car when the day came to leave for Charlotte. 

The drive was a long one, over 10 hours. Charles was seated in the backseat by the right window, with Buddy’s head in his lap. He was softly tangling his fingers through the dogs fur, massaging its scalp and ears, trying to get the soft fur to soothe his bubbling anxiety. With one hand buried in the golden retriever’s fur and the other curled into a shaking fist, Charles anxiously waited for them to arrive, which would be in about 10 minutes. Buddy, being the trained emotional support dog that he is, lifted his head to gently lick the telepath’s hand and wrist. It made the almost sixteen year old smile and let out a small giggle. The dog nudged at the small, red backpack that was down at Charles’ feet, and the boy understood what Buddy was reminding him of. With a sigh, he reached into the backpack to retrieve his water bottle and two bottles of pills. He took one of each, swallowing them dry but washing them down entirely with the water.  
“Happy?” He asked the dog, who just reached its furry head up to nose at Charles’ ear and started licking his cheek.  
The boy chuckled, his mother glancing back at him through the rear view mirror. Her face was expressionless, almost scary with how little emotions she had towards her own son.  
“It’s his fault his father is dead. It’s all his fault. I’ll be better off without him”, she thought, and luckily, the young telepath was too occupied with his dog to hear it.

Once they arrived, Charles’ mother immediately got out of the car, going around it to the back to get Charles’ luggage out while he put Buddy’s red vest on, a bit nervous about it, seeing as everyone will immediately know about his issues because of that red vest. Not to mention that he’s gonna have to carry (more like drag behind him) the weighted blanket.  
Connecting the leash to Buddy’s vest, he stepped out of the car with the golden retriever, fingernails digging into the flesh of his palms, trying to get the pain to ground him. The leash was wrapped around his wrist and laid in his palm, his fingers clutching it tightly.  
“C’mon, Buddy”, he said, seeing his mother already at the door of the huge building that would apparently be his new school with the man that came and visited them four days ago, Mr. Davis.  
With his weighted blanket slung over his shoulder (god that’s heavy) and the other hand holding Buddy’s leash, leading him up the stairs to the huge doors.  
“Ah, Mr. Xavier!” Mr. Davis said. “Welcome to Grey School for gifted youngsters! Let’s not stand around here, I’ll show you to your dorm for you to leave your things there and then I’ll show you around the building.”  
Charles could only nod, following behind Sharon who was walking after Mr. Davis and stepping inside the large building.  
“You’re lucky, everyone has class for at least another hour at the moment, so we’ll be undisturbed”, the man said. “Oh, and don’t worry about your dog, you can bring him to class. You’ll have to talk to the chef about it being in the cafeteria though.”  
“Alright”, Charles said, not really having thought about bringing Buddy with him.  
Guess he will now. Surely no one would hurt the golden retriever, right? He hoped so. The taller man walked through the big entrance hall with fast steps, turning to a corridor on the left and continuing to walk through the long halls. There were doors on each side and Charles could hear a lot of loud voices, talking over each other. The telepath pressed two fingers against his temple, trying to keep the voices out, knowing they couldn’t possibly all be talking. They were thinking.  
“There’s supposed to be a new student here today. I heard it’s a he. I wonder what he’s like… “  
“I hope the new student is hot… “  
“Math is so boring, I wish… “  
“When does this lesson end? ANOTHER HOUR?! I should’ve just stayed in bed today… “  
“Don’t phase, don’t phase, don’t phase… fuck fuck, is my hand phasing? Stay solid please please please… everyone’s gonna know what you are if you phase, and frankly, I don’t know if the basement goes under this classroom… “  
Charles was alarmed at that thought, realizing that a mutant was having troubles with their powers. He shook off the image he got from her, seemingly sinking into the floor and then getting stuck under it, instead he kept his two fingers at his temple, making sure his mother wasn’t looking at him and then focused on projecting to Mr. Davis.  
“Mr. Davis, it’s Charles. It seems as one of your students is having trouble controlling her abilities at the moment”, Charles looked through her memories, trying to focus on her and on finding out her name. “Kitty Pryde?”  
Mr. Davis had flinched when he suddenly heard Charles’ voice in his head, glancing back at the teenager.  
“Thank you for letting me know, Mr. Xavier. I’ll notify her teacher.”  
Charles let his fingers fall from his temple, watching as Mr. Davis took a phone out of his pocket, texting someone something and then sliding it into his pocket again.  
They reached the stairwell, starting to walk up the many stairs. Once they reached all the way up, they went to the left again, passing several huge windows that let the halls feel free and light.  
“Here is where the dorms start, to the right are some more classrooms, but I’ll show you those in a minute”, Mr. Davis said, leading them down the halls, then going left again and continuing to walk.  
There were numbers and letters on the doors, and eventually they stopped in front of a door with a sign saying “7B” and being almost at the end of the hall.  
“This is your dorm”, Mr. Davis said, getting out a key and opening the door, then handing it to Charles. “Don’t lose your key.”  
The door opened and they stepped inside. There were three beds in the room, and a door to a bathroom. Two of the beds, and respective shelves and closets seemed taken already, suitcases lying open next to one of them and the other one neatly made, the suitcase under the bed and the closet door shut. It seemed as one person had immediately unpacked, the only things that gave away someone living in that space being the few books on the shelf, whereas the other person was messy and hadn’t bothered unpacking yet, nor making their bed in the morning.  
“Your roommates are Alex Summers and Sean Cassidy”, Mr. Davis said. “You share many of your classes with them as well.”  
Charles nodded. “They don’t have anything against Buddy though, do they? Will he be a problem?”  
“No, no, that’s alright. I asked them myself”, he said and Charles wondered how he knew about Buddy, seeing as he wasn’t wearing his vest when they met.  
Charles’ mother put the big suitcase which she had been dragging behind herself next to the free bed. The teenager put the weighted blanket down on top of the bed, his arm relieved once the weight was gone.  
“I think it’s time I show you the school”, Mr. Davis said and then turned to Sharon. “You’re free to go, I am sure the trip back is horribly long.”  
“Goodbye, Charles”, Sharon said.  
“Goodbye, mother”, Charles said quietly and then she left.  
“Alright, I’ll show you around now and then you can unpack. I’ll give you your schedule and a map of the building, so you can attend lunch, and then after that you can go to the classes”, Mr. Davis said and then pointed at a couple doors at the end of the corridor. “There are showers there, boys and girls each have their own, of course, and bathrooms as well. There are several toilets all over the building, so you know. Even though everyone has a small bathroom in each of your dorms, it’s practical to have more. We have four floors, but we don’t use the basement, unless some of the mutants need more private training. Half of the upper two floors are for dorms and half of the last floor up consists of several shelves with board games, two ping pong tables, two billiard tables and also several couches. We have a library a floor above the cafeteria, which I definitely recommend visiting even if it’s not for school material. The basement is only used for mutant training, or sometimes gym class. We do have a gym all the way upstairs though. Oh, and don’t worry, both your roommates are mutants as well. We’d never pair a mutant and someone who isn’t one in the same room.”  
Charles just nodded, not really sure of what to say as they walked down the halls again and towards the stairwell. Buddy licked Charles’ hand, sensing the teen’s anxiety and general nervousness. Charles was thankful that Mr. Davis was letting him take Buddy with him everywhere, feeling calmer by the dog’s presence. He got to think about how it’s also probably for the best, seeing as Buddy won’t let Charles disappear anywhere alone to have a panic attack, or, even worse, hurt himself. Or kill himself, for that matter, even though he won’t tell his therapist that. His mother had made arrangements for him to see a therapist close to the school, given that person all his files, which, frankly, was pretty scary. He would be seeing her every Thursday, which makes their first session on the 17th, seeing as today was Tuesday.  
They walked past all the classrooms again, through the entrance hall that also had two sets of stairs going both left and right, and kept walking straight forward. A couple rooms were on the sides before they got to two bigger doors again, which were both open, giving Charles a look into the huge cafeteria.  
“I think we could try this out at first, but if you feel overwhelmed by all the people, and specifically their thoughts, you can be in one of these rooms”, Mr. Davis gestured to a couple of the doors that said “Spare” on them. “Then we can start trying to put one or two people in there with you, so you can slowly adapt. The rooms are shielded specifically for telepaths so they won’t get headaches from the commotion outside. One of our telepaths, Jean, tends to be in one of these rooms at times. She’s fourteen, so two classes below you.”  
“Y-you have other telepaths?” Charles asked.  
“Yes, two of them”, Mr. Davis smiled. “Emma Frost and Jean Grey. And now you. You’ll be meeting them soon enough, the telepaths have extra lessons on Saturdays in the basement, seeing as telepathy is a rather tricky mutation to control.”  
Charles nodded.  
“I’ll show you where my office is, if you have any questions or troubles, just ask me or any other teacher, all our teachers are either mutants or supporters and aware of the school’s situation with its students. I’m sorry you weren’t able to meet the principal today, he’s very busy these times.”  
“That’s alright, I understand”, Charles said, not wanting someone as busy as the principal seems to be to go out of their way just to meet him.  
They had walked back to the entrance hall and up the stairs, then up the big stairs on the right and walking down the hall. The first door had a sign that said “Teacher’s lounge” and the door on the other side of that said “Vice principal Mr. Davis”. Another door next to the vice principal’s said “Principal Lee”.  
“That’s the principal’s office, Mr. Lee, you’ll meet him soon enough, that’s the teacher’s lounge, feel free to knock there anytime, and then this is my office”, Mr. Davis gestured to his office and then pulled out a key to unlock it. “A bit further down this hall is the library, you see the doors.”  
Charles nodded and Mr. Davis opened the door to his office, letting Charles and Buddy inside and then himself.  
“I understand you’ll be gone for an hour every Thursday at 2 pm?” The man asked and Charles could only nod, his face feeling a bit hot from embarrassment. “That’s no problem, I’ll contact your teacher and make sure you get the opportunity to retake that class. Here’s your schedule.”  
He handed Charles a colourful paper.  
“And here are three maps, one for each floor we use”, he said. “When it’s time for the basement, I’m sure Emma or Jean or any other mutant will be able to help you.”  
“How do I know… who’s a… like me?” Charles asked nervously, afraid he’s going to slip up and say the wrong thing.  
It’s a bit of a risky thing putting mutants and normal people in the same school, the teen thought.  
“Well, you’re a telepath”, the man said with a smile. “And you’ll meet most of them in your special classes anyway. Oh! And I arranged a meeting for all mutants at this school tonight in the basement, seeing as we have quite a few newcomers and it can be helpful to get to know each other.”  
“Oh, at what time?” Charles asked, heart racing at the thought of meeting others like him.  
“At around 11 pm, but don’t worry, Alex and Sean will show you the way”, Mr. Davis said and then looked at his watch. “Well, I think you’ve seen the most important things now. Lunch is in 20 minutes, so I suggest you start unpacking.”  
“Thank you, sir”, the telepath said.  
“No problem. You’ll find your way back, won’t you?”  
The teenager nodded, turning around and beckoning Buddy to follow him as he walked out of the door and back to the stairs that lead down to the entrance hall. Passing all the classrooms again, the thoughts started buzzing louder again and he pressed a hand against his temple.  
“Be quiet… please, just shut up… “  
He continued walking down the halls, suddenly thinking of the girl called Kitty Pryde again. He hopes she got help, phasing through the floor and getting stuck there seems like a terrible thing. Especially in front of humans.  
Buddy whined next to him and Charles chuckled.  
“Hungry, Bud?” He asked the dog. “I’ll feed you soon, I can probably skip the first 20 minutes of lunch anyway to take a walk with you.”  
The dog’s tail started wagging back and forth and Charles smiled as they climbed the spiral staircase. At their dorm door, Charles pulled out the key out of his pocket and unlocked it, inside relieving Buddy of his leash, but keeping the vest on. He opened his big suitcase and got out Buddy’s dog bowl and his food. He prepared the golden retriever’s food with water from the tap in the bathroom and then put it on the shelf so Buddy wouldn’t get it yet. The dog curled in on himself on Charles’ bed next to the suitcase (let’s just say the bed was full with both the dog and the huge suitcase on it) and the teenager started to unpack his things. He put his books on the shelves and some in his desk and nightstand and then put all his clothes in the small closet. He put his laptop and the charger in a drawer on the closet and put his notebooks with two pencil cases messily on his desk. He put the dog food in his closet too and then pushed the suitcase under his bed. He sat down next to Buddy, stroking the dog’s golden fur when the door opened, causing him to flinch in surprise.  
“Oh, hello!” A voice said and Charles looked over to see a tall, kind of muscular blonde guy stand there next to someone a bit shorter, with shaggy ginger locks and loads of freckles in his pale face. “I’m Alex, this is Sean. You must be Charles.”  
“Y-yes, that’s him, I-I mean, that’s me”, Charles said, mentally beating himself up for that already.  
“It’s nice to meet you! We just came here to put our books down, it’s lunch now”, they said. “Are you coming?”  
“Um, I was about to feed and go on a walk with Buddy… I can hurry though, I mean I know where the cafeteria is”, Charles said.  
“Oh, alright”, Alex said.  
“Aww that dog is so cute! I wish I had a dog. Wait, technically, we have a dog now, since I share a room with him. And Charles seems nice too. I wonder if he’d let me pet the dog some time… “  
Charles smiled at Sean’s thoughts. “If you want you can pet him.”  
Sean looked at him in astonishment.  
“How did you-?”  
“Telepath”, Charles said, tapping his index finger against his temple.  
“Ohh, cool!” Sean said and then took a few steps forward to sit next to Charles’ bed to pet Buddy.  
“You’ll find out about everyone else’s mutations tonight at 11 pm”, Alex said. “So, we’ll see you soon.”  
“Yeah”, Charles nodded.  
“Bye!” Sean said before leaving with Alex.  
Charles stood up and put down Buddy’s bowl. “C’mon Buddy, eat.”  
The dog attacked the food and Charles smiled, waiting patiently with the golden retriever’s leash in his hands for him to finish.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked the first chapter! I'm working on the second one right now, but my updates won't be frequent because of school (finals year with national tests in Sweden). So I have a lot on my mind, but I'll write as much as possible (: Btw I love comments, constructive critisism is appreciated


End file.
